Merry Christmas! Yes, I said Merry Christmas. Not happy holidays or enjoy the holidays or any of that other crap. To me, it's Merry Christmas. And you know what? It's not all about Jesus and Christianity. It's about a holiday that celebrates family and love and presents. Yes, it's also Jesus' birthday and I don't want to downplay that. I'm just saying, there are a lot of other things associated with Christmas. What's the big deal?
I was at a bar crawl this past weekend in Georgetown called the Santa Stumble. Everyone in attendance was dressed up in some kind of festive outfit trying to out-do everyone else. Everybody there was drinking, dancing, drinking and having a great time. The entire neighborhood was decorated and you could just feel the "Christmas spirit." And you know what? It had nothing to do with religion. It had everything to do with getting together with friends and family and having a good time. Why can't it be that way for the rest of the world?
Some people believe strongly that December 25th is all about the birth of Christ. It should be used to gather with family and rejoice in the salvation he brought us.
Some people believe that December 25th is about Santa bringing presents to all the good little boys and girls of the world.
Some people believe that December 25th is a holiday created by corporations to sell products.
I believe that Christmas is a great holiday to decorate whatever you want, dress in ugly sweaters, put up a tree, wrap gifts, enjoy family and friends, drink (ir)responsibly and get a couple days off work.
I have a question.
What's the difference? Whether you're celebrating the birth of Christ or some fat dude breaking and entering, just enjoy it and keep your mouth shut. And if you are one of those people that doesn't believe in God or Santa, you can still believe in family and friends. You can still enjoy the decorations and music and the general atmosphere of the season. Right? It doesn't have to be a religious event for everyone.
You can celebrate it however you'd like. The bottom line is, it's Christmas either way. If you want to do it by putting up a baby Jesus nativity scene, go for it! If you want to celebrate it by putting up a giant Santa in your yard, go for it. If you want to put up a Wacky Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man, by all means, go for it. As long as you let everyone else celebrate it the way they want to.
Freedom of religion is real and should be respected. What I'm trying to do is bring everyone together for the sake of celebration. Forget the details about why, just do it. And have fun with it. Let everyone else have fun with it and we'll all feel better. The bickering about the true meaning of Christmas and whether to say happy holidays or not is all bullshit. The holiday is Christmas, no matter what it means to you. If you say Happy Chanukah to me, you'll get the same in response. Out of respect. So if I say Merry Christmas to you, just say it right back and move on with your day. Don't make a big deal out of it. If you say happy holidays to me, I'm going to kick you in the pills. If you're a lady, I'll give you the stink-eye. And I don't mean I'll look at your weird. I mean I'll bend over, drop my pants and show you my balloon knot. The point is, respect everyone else's freedoms and enjoy yours. If we all did that, we'd be some happy mother fuckers.
So I'll put my Santa hat on, head over to the GoodWill, and get someone to play with my candy cane and jingle bells. For a Ham Sandwich of course. Merry Christmas!
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