Despite All My Rage, Fuck Nicolas Cage
Over the weekend, Nicolas Cage was arrested for domestic abuse, disturbing the peace, and public drunkenness while filming his newest movie in New Orleans . This incident brings into question a disturbing trend in today’s America : How the hell does Nicolas Cage keep getting $20+ million to star in films?!?!
I am not a film critic. I also have not seen all of Cage’s films. However, I have seen enough to know this guy is a no-talent ass clown. I have no issue with an actor making more than $20 million per film. However, I have a problem when the actor isn’t any good.
Nic Cage won an Oscar for his role in “Leaving Las Vegas” as a suicidal alcoholic who has a complex relationship with a prostitute. It must have been a real stretch for him to play a degenerate whore-loving boozer (Based on this weekend, I assume he knows how to enjoy a cocktail. As for the whores, he seems like the kind of guy with extra ham sandwiches in his pocket. Also, I believe anyone that has ever played Xbox in Shawn’s basement could have replaced Cage and won the award as well.) I realize this award allows him to command a higher salary. Let’s examine some of his other noteworthy movies:
The Rock: I’ve seen this movie approximately 6,000 times (5,996 of them due to this being Pat’s go-to DirectTV movie in the past year.) The movie is saved by Sean Connery, Ed Harris, and the rest of the cast. Cage as a doctor wasn’t believable in the first place. Cage as a doctor who kicks the asses of hardcore renegade Marines is an acting abortion. I’m willing to give him a mulligan since this is his first film after “Leaving Las Vegas”.
Con Air: This might be the greatest “bad” movie of our generation. However, Cage ruins this movie for me. His portrayal as Cameron Poe is lacking to say the least. His Southern accent was as if he decided to make one up five minutes before filming. I still maintain if Keanu Reeves would have starred in this movie, he’d be known as “Academy Award winning actor Keanu Reeves.” I’m noticing a trend.
Face-Off: As a guy who loves unrealistic movies, even I couldn’t get past the fact Cage and John Travolta switching faces/voices despite the noticeable height and weight differences between the two. I don’t think Pacino and DeNiro could have saved this piece of crap much less Cage and Vincent Vega.
After these movies, Cage became an actor demanding eight figures and routinely getting paid. Some of movies did well, most did not. However, the fact remains Nicolas Cage is an overpriced, overrated actor. We need to stop him America . He’ll keep buying castles and vintage comic books and evading the IRS if Hollywood keeps cutting the check. Hollywood won’t stop paying this man unless we stop shelling out $12 a ticket to see him in movie theaters. It’s up to you people. I am begging you.
-Written by Marcus Boyd
No comments:
Post a Comment